my one week break started since last saturday. wanted to go home on sunday, but couldnt make it. thought i could go back on monday, but didnt make it too. so the next date is this coming friday.
couldnt go back becos i took my own sweet time to clear up my room. i need the internet and i should have tried my best to finish up my research for the pile of reports and assignments, all of which are due in the week right after the break, so that i could go home as i planned. but i didnt. thats y i m still in KL.
usually holidays r for me to rest. at home in JB i cant online, n the only way i can be reached is through my hp. thus, it is the best time for me to isolate myself from the world for a while. a period of time for me to rest, to clear up my mind, to reflect, to concentrate on my work, to recharge. this time round i m stucked in KL. in KL i have my own room. i m the only living thing in the room, and thats a bit too depressing for me. thus since long time ago i get into the habit of staying online, having my msn on, playing music most of the time, so that i wont feel too lonely in the room. for normal school days or weekends i m fine with this way of living. but for holidays, i prefer to go home n get away from the world, which i still cant do it yet for this holidays.
for these few days, i m still online. i just want the msn on to keep me company, to chat with ppl when i feel like doing it n i dont mind ppl chatting with me. i dont mind casual talks. but these days, when i m online, i become a target for help on sch work. one or two questions, fine. whole bunch of them?? PLEASE. GIVE ME A BREAK. i havent started on my work yet. i dont know the answers. it is not that i dont want to help, but i really dont know. sigh...i dont know wat to say.
my mood has not been good for some time. i have been looking forward to the day to go home to adjust myself but the day has been delayed becos of my own fault. i wish ppl can just chat with me becos they care about me, want to know how my life is, how i m feeling now. but most of the time ppl chat with me becos they need help for their work. it is not that i dont want to help, but i m just a bit too tired when ppl just throw me with strings of questions. sigh..
today i started to have diarrhoea. i thought today after i woke up i could just start clearing off my work but i ended up spending most of my time on the bed n in toilet. i m turning sick n i have tonnes of work to clear off. i want to go home but i need the internet.
i m physically weak. emotionally weak. all i want now is to concentrate on my work. please chat with me becos u care about me n want to cheer me up, not becos u need help from me.
there are many uncertainties in life, arent there? or rather, how certain can u be for most of the things in life?
i m not sure how certain things will turn out in future. currently things seem to be going well in a way. but the reality is telling me that things wont work out the way i hope they will be.
my head is telling me to be real. better stop. it is not going to work.
but my heart tells me to try. no harm. so why not?
well i dont know. what my head says is quite true but..haih.
maybe i should just remember wat my friend said to me. ya..very sound advice.
well..shall just see how. things will work the way they are meant to be. thats life, isnt it?
Have not been blogging for quite some time.busy. last week was quite a busy n stressful week: 1 mid term test, 1 assignment. finally nothing turned out too bad i guess. i hope.
Last friday (22/9/2006), assignment due date n also Monash Ball 2006. rushed my assignment until afternoon, finally got it done n went to the salon to have my hair n make up done. just like last year. last year on the day for Monash Ball we also had an assignment due n i rushed until the very end too before finally went to get ready for the ball...sigh. bad habit is REALLY HARD to change. i m just not determined enough i guess.
So..for the ball. at first i was feeling quite excited. but then started to feel bored n moody. camera battery ran out really early. didnt take too much photos. sigh. the night was actually brightened up by someone. didnt expect to see him there. so was a bit surprised to meet him there. glad that finally found a chance to take a photo with him. nice little surprise for the night :) after the ball went mamak with my friends, had quite a good time during mamak. and thats the end of the ball night. glad that i still have some nice memory for the night. not too bad afterall.
This week is actually my one week break. but i m still stucked in KL becos i need to use the internet to do some research for my pile of reports n assignments. back at home in JB i dont have internet connection so i cant go home yet. i m only going home on this friday. sigh....
Guess this week wont be too happy. so much work. stucked in KL. cant go home early. sigh my mind is in a mess la..anyway going to put up some of my favourite photos for the ball. i have more on my friendster.
my dearie
left: Monash Ball 2005. right: Monash Ball 2006. deja vu? how can it be so alike? haha. sometimes coincidence really does happen in life.
one of my previous posts on my friendster blog before i moved over to Blogger. is a story about this photo. share with u too :)
"30 April 2006. 1.52am.
.....there is actually a little story behind the photo shown here on my blog now..i took this photo during my ecology field trip to Kuala Selangor..when few of us went to watch the sunset..saw this loving couple watching sunset..they were not some young couple..both of them should be at least around middle age n the man's hair was turning grey already..they were watching the sunset happily..helped each other took photos..they looked so loving n happy..envy them..isnt it wonderful if u can grow old together with that someone u love? growing old together...going through all the obstacles in life..enjoying happy times together..until the very end..is definitely not easy to go such a far way for a relationship nowadays..dats wat i think..guess wat i saw can be considered as one of the true happiness in life..true happiness (真正的幸福)..他们看起来真的很幸福..such a wonderful moment n scene..thus deciced to capture it down with a camera.. 或许 真正的幸福 就是能和你所爱的人一起变老"
Cloudy cooling morning. due to the rain last night. finished my breakfast in front of the tv..was watching some music videos on MTV. 'Asia Takeaway', meaning all the mvs r either korean, japanese or mandarin. tempted to just stay in front of the tv n finished off the programme. but i guess i should start my day.
Wasted last night. wanted to do my work but i didnt have the mood to do it. my mood was quite bad. it has been bad for a few days, kind of troubled. down n depressed. i dont know how to cheer myself up. i guess it is time for me to go home n recharge. time to give myself some time to sort out my thoughts.
This weekend would be quite occupied. Saturday would have to go back to uni for a pratical session. Sunday will be going for an activity called International Coastal Cleanup. will be going to Port Dickson, Seremban, to clean up the beach there. hope it would be fun :)
Some of the photos taken during the Taman Negara trip. some of which i like a lot. there are a few more on my friendster. feel free to have a look.
didnt sleep well for these 2 days. was trying to study for the mid term test yesterday n for a tutorial preparation today..has not been feeling very happy these days too...today feel quite down. dont really feel like talking, dont really have much enthusiasm for anything, cant really concentrate in lectures..all i want is to go home n have some sleep. i need some good sleep.
i hope i can find some ways to cheer myself up. but so far nothing really helps much haha..sigh. there are some movies being released this week. feel like watching them but i need a companion. in the past i had my usual movie kaki to go with me but recently she has left for UK. sigh...miss her. i need someone to watch movie with me. I WANT TO WATCH MOVIE :(
realise some ppl r kind of hard to interact with...their attitude. how to get to know them better then? sigh i dont know la..maybe i should stop trying. i m tired.
i miss Pulau Redang. i miss Genting. i miss Taman Negara. sigh..guess i really have to get some good sleep tonight. hope tomorrow i will feel better.
chatted with someone a while ago. it has been quite some time since the last time i chatted with him. n it has been AGES since the last time i met him haha...
same old kind of friendliness. reminded me of the calls we used to have long time ago.
but things r different now already. everyone moves on with one's life one way or another. some things may be still the same but there are changes nonetheless haha..thats life, isnt it? changes take place throughout our lives. not all the things will remain unchanged, or should i say hardly anything? hahaha
In the past i used to have this thinking that to be in a relationship, to have someone special in ur life, is something wonderful that will only bring happiness. after all these years, looking at ppl ard me having relationships, listening to their experiences, stories, advice, realise that the thinking i have for relationships is really a naive one. ppl do suffer too when they r in a relationship, is not just about happiness. they face problems too. they get hurt too. quarrels. worries. troubled. tears.
So u still want to be in a relationship if u have never had one before yet? haha..well will only see how if life says that it is time to try one. i m still a freebird now.
Just hope dat for those around me now who r troubled becos of their relationship will feel better soon. it is sad to see them feeling bad n unhappy. n i can do nothing much to help but just listening n trying my best to console them, cheering them up. hope things will be better for them soon.
went for a movie with my 2nd cousin after my class. watched Monster House. this movie was much better than Ant Bully. the idea was good, storyline was good..but the characters were a bit woody hehe..according to my cousin the woodiness was becos they shoot it by moving the models they made, not by drawing. anyway it was a good movie :)
today did some shopping before the movie. bought Jay Chou's latest album, 'Still Fantasy', and the poster too. also bought a pair of heels hehehe..the purple one i bought last time is a bit worn out already then saw a pair which i liked n fitted quite well. my mood had been bad since yesterday so bought the things which caught my attention, so as to make myself happy (bought them after consideration la..i m not so rich until i can just buy anything). think i wont shop until some time later since today really spent a lot already. will try to study hard for the test next week since i have had so much fun n bought new things too.
my new Jay Chou poster :)
this one shows roughly how big the poster is.
the high heels which i bought today
this pair of high heels is the pair i bought 2 or 3 weeks ago. going to wear this for the ball on 22/9
this weekend doesnt have to do any reports :D but got to study for 1 mid term test. is ok i always prefer studying to doing work. will try to start a bit now. have a wonderful weekend!
bad mood. since last night. thought today after i woke up i will feel better but no, after a while bad mood comes back again..just feel like shouting on someone or something. ARGH!
i dont really know the reason. i dont know wats wrong. WHATS WRONG?!?!? i have been sleeping early n waking up early. but still feel kind of tired..long sleep but no quality i guess. i need my afternoon nap.
sigh..feel kind of bad. wrote a testimonial for someone yesterday n i included the word 'mean'..maybe i shouldnt have put down the word 'mean'. n seems dat the person keeps dat word loud in mind haha. guess my bad mood is starting to affect ppl. sigh i dont know..
going to watch a movie later. hope i will feel better.
Didnt post anything for about one week plus. had been really busy since last week... last monday - last wednesday(28/8-30/8): rushing report n a presentation last thursday- last sunday (31/8 - 3/9): field trip to Taman Negara, Pahang last sunday night- yesterday noon(3/9-5/9): rushing assignment n report
Finally got over everything yesterday noon n now can relax for a while. at least dont really have anything due for this week :) sigh....need to rest more, eat more regularly
The field trip to Taman Negara was quite fun. spent 4 days 3 nights there. actually we didnt do anything much but just jungle trekking.looking at the plants, the animals..the resort we stayed in was situated by the river Sungai Pahang (not a very high class resort, just a cheap, affordable one) n it was fun travelling on the boat along the river. but the boat rides were really expensive. what to do..we had to take the boat so no choice loh eventhough it was costly. it was also quite fun eating at the restaurants which were floating on the river. u can actually feel the whole restaurant is moving hahaha. really had quite a good rest for the 3 nights over there. slept so early, did nothing but watch tv then went to bed. they actually had astro over there eventhough there is no reception for handphones at the resort we stayed hahaha..but in the forest in Taman Negara there was reception for handphones! haha..during the trip we went for canopy walk. did a night walk but didnt see anything too special, saw some insects, spiders, an owl, some other birds. but on our way back on the boat, we saw an otter! and also hornbills, some monkeys, king fisher and some birds. quite a nice trip. miss those nights which i slept so early n did nothing but watched tv...
On Monday night (4/9)..met Sook Meng. Eugene How n Tho Wei went too. too bad Ken Chiew n Evona couldnt make it. So glad to meet Sook Meng. it has been such a long time since the last time i met her. i cant even remember when the last meeting was. we had dinner together then just remained there chatting until 10pm plus, time for the shops to close. sigh..such a short outing with her. wonder when we can meet again.
dinner at KFC, Mid Valley
Sook Meng
Tho Wei, Sook Meng, Eugene Yesterday (6/9) went for a movie with my movie kaki. she is leaving to UK on this friday to study for her master. so no matter what this week definitely had to meet her one more time before she leaves. we watched On The Edge (黑白道) starring Nick Cheung (张家辉), Anthony Wong (黄秋生) and Francis Ng (吴镇宇). it was about an undercover cop who could finally leave his life as a gangster n gained back the life as a normal cop but he faced problems coping with his new life. but at the end he was killed. quite a sad story..tells us how realistic life is. sigh..will definitely going to miss my movie kaki. we watch quite a number of movies, also shop together..there was a period of time when i followed her father's car to go for 8am lecture when she was still studying in Sunway College. how can i not miss her? well dats life..sometimes we have no choice but have to part with ppl around us eventhough we r relunctant to do so. i wish her all the best in her life. hope one day we can watch movie together again.
me n my movie kaki, Chai Chee outside the vietnamese restaurant in Mid Valley
