horrible
these few days had been so busy. rushing one work after another. had not been sleeping well for a few days. thought today after i settled the presentation i could give myself a short little break, go shop for a pair of high heels for the ball next month. well..the presentation wasnt too bad. but before i got a chance to start my little break by first having my lunch, i received some horrible annoying news. well those words were meant to be good, becos the purpose was to clear up some misunderstandings. but at that moment the least i wanted to hear was horrible things that can agitate me. i m tired enough already after rushing so much n sleeping disorderly for few days n all i wanted was to leave uni, go find my high heels n then go home rest, before i start another round of rushing for next week which is going to be so terrible. but..things didnt really go the way i wish.
misunderstanding. misunderstanding. misunderstanding. sometimes i really wonder whether the problem really lies on me myself. sigh i dont know. after hearing those misunderstanding about me, i felt like meeting up all those ppl n told them wat the situation really was. i looked dead n unhappy during the ball last year just simply becos i was really very very tired as i had been rushing my work the night before the ball n i didnt sleep for dat night. i didnt feel unhappy, esp about certain things but just simply plain tiredness. n some ppl were just so annoying. they gave u hurtful replies when u asked them things just simply becos they were worried about some assignments at dat particular moment. then they blamed u for not being direct enough to ask for a request. oh come on, i thought being too direct is hurtful n impolite? so i guess i should be very very direct in future? dont they ever notice dat actually their reply were hurtful? n now they were saying dat i wasnt direct enough in asking for something. n for goodness's sake i have never really shouted on ppl or making rude replies when ppl talk to me during the time when i m rushing my work. sigh..i dont know wat to say.
n yes. another presentation next week. not to mention the reports n assignments. presentation = stress. got to face my hardworking groupmate again. n yes today already got some quite 'nice' reply n yes i was given a very simple task becos my last minutesness i guess had been unbearable for the ppl concerned. well, u dont like my last minuteness, I ALSO DONT LIKE THE WAY U DO THINGS SO FAST. if u dont want to change ur way of doing things becos of me, n obviously i dont expect u to do dat, i also dont want to do things in ur super duper fast way. all i want is just a bit of understanding from u n u cant do dat? then fine. FINE.
after hearing all those misunderstandings, i totally lost my mood to do anything at all. lost my appetite eventhough i was quite hungry. after i bought fried rice for lunch, i didnt feel like eating but just wanted to cry. then after lunch when i left uni, i saw the yellow bus dat i wanted to take ran off before i managed to reach the gate. i wasnt in a mood to wait for a bus, so stubborn me just started walking to dat faraway bus stop without thinking much, ignoring the fact dat today actually i was wearing high heel. well venting anger n unhappiness on myself definitely wont make anyone else except myself suffer right? so dats it. thats the way i treat myself sometimes, will just do silly things to vent my anger or unsatisfaction or watever. i just dont care as long as i can make myself feel at least a bit better or reduce the level of anger or unhappiness. ya i m crazy.
all i hope now is no more hurtful words from anyone. no more news which can agitate me. i cant afford to get agitated with the amount of reports assignments n a little mini test all for me next week. i m really overwhelmed by the amount of work which i need to complete next week.
but nevertheless, some good things still happened for today.
- bought the high heels as planned. well heart quite pain actually becos it is quite ex.
- it was raining on my way back home. thank god my 2nd cousin could come to the lrt station to pick me up. if not god knows how wet i can get walking home in dat kind of heavy rain with wind.
n he has been sending me to uni EVERYDAY. no matter how early my class is. n i m the one who has been unable to wake up on time becos i sleep at odd hours, he is the one who wakes up on time n come n wake me up. i really dont know how to repay his kindness. so now i only asks him to send me. i make my own way back home, will only call him if no choice, eg raining. just hope dat things will carry on this way for my transport.
hope tmr will be good.
misunderstanding. misunderstanding. misunderstanding. sometimes i really wonder whether the problem really lies on me myself. sigh i dont know. after hearing those misunderstanding about me, i felt like meeting up all those ppl n told them wat the situation really was. i looked dead n unhappy during the ball last year just simply becos i was really very very tired as i had been rushing my work the night before the ball n i didnt sleep for dat night. i didnt feel unhappy, esp about certain things but just simply plain tiredness. n some ppl were just so annoying. they gave u hurtful replies when u asked them things just simply becos they were worried about some assignments at dat particular moment. then they blamed u for not being direct enough to ask for a request. oh come on, i thought being too direct is hurtful n impolite? so i guess i should be very very direct in future? dont they ever notice dat actually their reply were hurtful? n now they were saying dat i wasnt direct enough in asking for something. n for goodness's sake i have never really shouted on ppl or making rude replies when ppl talk to me during the time when i m rushing my work. sigh..i dont know wat to say.
n yes. another presentation next week. not to mention the reports n assignments. presentation = stress. got to face my hardworking groupmate again. n yes today already got some quite 'nice' reply n yes i was given a very simple task becos my last minutesness i guess had been unbearable for the ppl concerned. well, u dont like my last minuteness, I ALSO DONT LIKE THE WAY U DO THINGS SO FAST. if u dont want to change ur way of doing things becos of me, n obviously i dont expect u to do dat, i also dont want to do things in ur super duper fast way. all i want is just a bit of understanding from u n u cant do dat? then fine. FINE.
after hearing all those misunderstandings, i totally lost my mood to do anything at all. lost my appetite eventhough i was quite hungry. after i bought fried rice for lunch, i didnt feel like eating but just wanted to cry. then after lunch when i left uni, i saw the yellow bus dat i wanted to take ran off before i managed to reach the gate. i wasnt in a mood to wait for a bus, so stubborn me just started walking to dat faraway bus stop without thinking much, ignoring the fact dat today actually i was wearing high heel. well venting anger n unhappiness on myself definitely wont make anyone else except myself suffer right? so dats it. thats the way i treat myself sometimes, will just do silly things to vent my anger or unsatisfaction or watever. i just dont care as long as i can make myself feel at least a bit better or reduce the level of anger or unhappiness. ya i m crazy.
all i hope now is no more hurtful words from anyone. no more news which can agitate me. i cant afford to get agitated with the amount of reports assignments n a little mini test all for me next week. i m really overwhelmed by the amount of work which i need to complete next week.
but nevertheless, some good things still happened for today.
- bought the high heels as planned. well heart quite pain actually becos it is quite ex.
- it was raining on my way back home. thank god my 2nd cousin could come to the lrt station to pick me up. if not god knows how wet i can get walking home in dat kind of heavy rain with wind.
n he has been sending me to uni EVERYDAY. no matter how early my class is. n i m the one who has been unable to wake up on time becos i sleep at odd hours, he is the one who wakes up on time n come n wake me up. i really dont know how to repay his kindness. so now i only asks him to send me. i make my own way back home, will only call him if no choice, eg raining. just hope dat things will carry on this way for my transport.
hope tmr will be good.
posted by wen at
8/25/2006 08:43:00 PM
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